woken up by my mum at 0800, led me to alot of thoughts on quitting school.
the accident 2 weeks ago is going to be a good lesson for me. It didnt teach me how to speed nor going fast into corners BUT i saw hw people change. or should i say the real side of human being. right after the accident, u ppl didnt even care abt my well being. Instead, the first qns YOU asked me was "how's the car?", "how am i going to work, go gym, go tis go tat?". Yes, i know. SBS, Comfort, these are the options for the time being. But when i had to settle the things with the garage or the insurance, did u give me time? did u give me options? NO. all YOU did was keep pushing me to get the temporary car for u. Hello~ all tis things need black n white == hell lot of time. Do YOU noe i got alot of test tat week? Do YOU noe i cab dwn frm tampines to clementi everyday? my lesson end at 4, the garage closes at 5,
do have i a choice?1 week later, when the insurance called n said tat they dun wan to repair the car, all u did was to rant at me n tell me to settle the bills. Do u really tink tat all these ranting, these questions can help me solve the problem? u keep asking me: 'hw am i going take find all the money to settle the car?'. I really dun mind withdrawing all my money, its all i can do. But wat abt YOU? This is ur car. And u didnt even put in effort to tink of a solution?!?! WTF. Once again, ur sms keeps coming in. The stress tat u r giving me is really unbearable.
Wat do u wan me to do? I wanted to Apologize but the attidude u gave me is holding me back.Retribution? Maybe. To tink tat we didnt even send tat old man to hospital on tat very day, it really seems tat its been shown on us. We seem unfilial. But does he deserve use tat word to describe us? i can still recall all the things he didnt do for us. He didnt bring us up. Neither did he bring us out to have fun nor taking care of us. I can still recall hw cruel he can be when he refuse to bring me the doctor when i broke my ankle in Primary 2. The best part is, his reason was so
short n sweet, simply "cannot! I meet my fren go fishing liao!". Fuck u bodoh! If u tink tat fren is so impt, den why did u start a family in the 1st place!
Under these circumstances, quitting school n work full time seems bright for me. And i can support myself too. (So YOU can ENJOY the car at ease without having to worry abt feeding the handicapped, useless old man.) Since YOU tink tat YOU need the car to go gym or go out with ur frens is soooo important, den i guess i will quit school before the main exams ba. And i can support myself too. At least i dun have to go thru another stressfull period. Anyway, my
GPA is onli 3.61, comparing to most of my classmates, im onli a average student. Or worse to say, maybe TP dun even wan me inside there.
After the term test, i really dunno why this feeling inside me is getting stronger n stronger. Maybe is the things YOU told mum ba. Sorry folks, i wun be mentioning wat is it but it is also the reason my mum woke me up n started tis entry.
St 11 brothers, TP frens, ITE frens n teachers, or simply just anyone, i really need opinions n views frm u guys n gals.
Before i end, i still remember tat morning u msg me tat i hurt u so much becos broke the "Love of ur life". Let me tell u, the Fucking attitude tat this whole family is giving me, really broke my heart thoroughly.
我的心真的受伤了
i love you,,
9:26 AM
